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Search found 23 matches

by 1962xk
Sat Dec 28, 2013 7:51 pm
Forum: The Speak Easy
Topic: Belated Seasons Greetings
Replies: 0
Views: 11019

Belated Seasons Greetings

G'day All.. I haven't been on site in some time, and it just occurred to me I should wish all the best of the season.. I see on the news that you are getting floods in the Old Dart... just a usual Christmas time in Australia... bloody hot.. I actually feel sorry for your cricket team, must have been...
by 1962xk
Fri Jun 28, 2013 12:01 pm
Forum: Joke Emporium
Topic: Bill for Nothing
Replies: 1
Views: 3544

Bill for Nothing

This isn't funny as in a joke, but is a chilling account of how far out of touch big business has gotten with the customer since the "computer age" takeover. GAS BILL Anything managed through bureaucracies!!!. You will like this! ... And it is a true story! A man living in Kandos (near Mudgee in NS...
by 1962xk
Sun Mar 10, 2013 2:19 am
Forum: Joke Emporium
Topic: Wales?
Replies: 0
Views: 4254

Wales?

I was at the bar the other night and overheard three very hefty women talking at the bar. Their accent appeared to be Scottish, so I approached and asked, "Hello, are you three lassies from Scotland?" One of them angrily screeched, "It's Wales, Wales you bloody idiot!" So I apologized and replied, "...
by 1962xk
Sat Jan 26, 2013 9:59 am
Forum: Joke Emporium
Topic: TWO IRISH WOMEN IN A BAR
Replies: 1
Views: 3575

Re: TWO IRISH WOMEN IN A BAR

Classic !! :clapping:
by 1962xk
Mon Oct 15, 2012 5:07 pm
Forum: Joke Emporium
Topic: One Liners
Replies: 1
Views: 3847

One Liners

Last night I reached for my liquid Viagra and accidentally swigged from a bottle of Liquid Paper. I woke up this morning with a huge correction. - My girlfriend said she was leaving me due to my obsession with the 60's group The Monkees. I thought she was joking ........ And then I saw her face........
by 1962xk
Tue Aug 21, 2012 7:47 pm
Forum: Joke Emporium
Topic: Should I Really Join Facebook?
Replies: 3
Views: 4200

Re: Should I Really Join Facebook?

Very topical, and totally understood.
by 1962xk
Sun Jan 01, 2012 8:37 pm
Forum: Joke Emporium
Topic: sensitive Aussie blokes
Replies: 1
Views: 3935

Re: sensitive Aussie blokes

As one,I can't see any problem with that. :good: ;)
by 1962xk
Mon Dec 19, 2011 9:00 am
Forum: Joke Emporium
Topic: TWO BLONDS
Replies: 0
Views: 4634

TWO BLONDS

Two blonds talking. First blond says " I slept with a Brazilian last night" Second blond is shocked. " You Slut" she says " thats the most disgusting thing I 've ever heard" They sit in silence for a couple of minutes , each contemplating her own thoughts, when the second blond says " OK I give up. ...
by 1962xk
Sat Nov 05, 2011 7:08 pm
Forum: Joke Emporium
Topic: Dead Duck
Replies: 1
Views: 2130

Dead Duck

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away." The distressed woman wail...
by 1962xk
Wed Jun 01, 2011 8:21 pm
Forum: Joke Emporium
Topic: With Age Comes Wisdom
Replies: 1
Views: 1801

With Age Comes Wisdom

A guy is 73 years old and loves to fish. He was sitting in his boat the other day when he heard a voice say, 'Pick me up.’ He looked around and couldn't see any one. He thought he was dreaming when he heard the voice say again,'Pick me up.' He looked in the water and there, floating on the top, was ...
by 1962xk
Wed Jun 01, 2011 8:17 pm
Forum: Joke Emporium
Topic: Tools...the implements not the Users
Replies: 2
Views: 1972

Tools...the implements not the Users

PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters. BELT SANDER: An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs. HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle. It transforms human en...
by 1962xk
Thu May 12, 2011 3:59 am
Forum: The Speak Easy
Topic: MARATHON MAN
Replies: 7
Views: 2413

Re: MARATHON MAN

Now that I've been given an education, thanks Chieftan for the link, a few pics of the stripped down, internally painted, Mahindra and associated bits and pieces. The last one is Sid the Dog looking awfully unsure of this roof thing that is on his jeep,,, happily he's come to accept it and is back t...
by 1962xk
Tue May 10, 2011 11:07 am
Forum: The Speak Easy
Topic: MARATHON MAN
Replies: 7
Views: 2413

Re: MARATHON MAN

panzerwomble : The parts weren't too bad as far as cost went. and were all available ex stock in the local stores :shock: not bad for a country town in Australia,, the brake bloke had to do a bit of a search through old stock but ended up with all the cups and boots to fit. The bearings were on the...
by 1962xk
Sun May 08, 2011 7:12 pm
Forum: The Speak Easy
Topic: MARATHON MAN
Replies: 7
Views: 2413

MARATHON MAN

I seem to have a unique ability to turn the most simple job into a marathon ... wet day last Tuesday so I thought I'd put the Mahindra I use for a farm knock-about into the workshop, principally to fix the handbrake that hasn't worked for the last 15 years. Not a drama, up on the hoist/ cable out, l...
by 1962xk
Fri May 14, 2010 9:01 pm
Forum: Joke Emporium
Topic: How it used to be ...
Replies: 4
Views: 2187

Re: How it used to be ...

Hi Alan..I stole your joke ( also shamelessly ) and passed it on...exactly the same here in Australia... it would appear that stupidity is a world wide trend. Regards Tony