Kiwi ventriloquist xxx

If its ADULT in nature please say so in the title.
Post Reply
User avatar
cheiftain
Technical Expert
Posts: 1985
Joined: Wed Apr 02, 2008 11:20 am
Location: Cockfield, Suffolk. Near Magrathea

Kiwi ventriloquist xxx

Post by cheiftain » Thu Aug 19, 2010 12:54 am

A Kiwi ventriloquist visiting Australia walks into a Small village and sees a local sitting on his veranda patting his dog.

He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Aussie

'G'day, mind if I talk to your dog?'

Villager: 'The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Kiwi.'

Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going mate?'

Dog: 'Yeah, doin' all right.'

Aussie: (look of extreme shock)

Ventriloquist: 'Is this villager your owner?' (pointing at the Villager)

Dog: 'Yep'

Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'

Dog: 'Yeah, real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food And takes me to the lake once a week to play.'

Aussie: (look of utter disbelief)

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'

Aussie: 'Uh, the horse doesn't talk either...I think.'

Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'

Horse: 'Cool'

Aussie: (absolutely dumbfounded)

Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?' (Pointing at the villager)

Horse: 'Yep'

Ventriloquist: How does he treat you?

Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, Brushes me down often and keeps me in the shed to protect me from the Elements..'

Aussie: (total look of amazement)

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'

Aussie: (in a panic) 'The sheep's a F*CKING' liar!!!
The journey isn't about departing in a well preserved body - but rather to skid in sideways - totally worn out - shouting HOLY SHIT WHAT A RIDE!!!!

Be More like a Dog, If you can't, Eat it, Play with it, Chase it, or Bark at it, Just Piss on it and walk away.

Post Reply